


How Do You Know When You Are Happy?

by ZenyZootSuit



Category: Kingdom Netflix, 킹덤 | Kingdom (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Chang becomes King, Angst, Arranged Marriage, Chang is a good man, Chang loves her as a friend, Cho Hak-ju's A+ Parenting, Coming of Age, Complicated concepts, Fluff, Friendship, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, It just doesn't happen, Kingdom Weekly, Married or not, Multi, No sex between the Queen and Chang, Not even implied - Freeform, Period-Typical Homophobia, Queen's POV, happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:55:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24307018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZenyZootSuit/pseuds/ZenyZootSuit
Summary: Haeun was just shy of her 14th birthday when her father told her she was betrothed to the King. Not three months later, the King was dead. A month after that, her father told her she was betrothed to the King.
Relationships: Cho Beom-il/Prince Lee Chang, Queen Consort Cho/Prince Lee Chang
Comments: 23
Kudos: 59





	How Do You Know When You Are Happy?

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so PSA: this fic does contain a 15 year old Queen Cho (in keeping with the fandom times, I named her Haeun) being married to a probably 27 year old Chang. This is an arranged marriage and Chang didn't really have a choice either (this is extensively discussed). There is NO SEX (and as such is not marked as underage) and not really any romance either, regardless of if Haeun thinks of it like that. She's just not used to people being nice to her and is really a bit too young to know what she wants or how she feels anyway. This is a coming of age fic, as such she discusses catching feelings for her husband but again, Chang only thinks of her as a friend.
> 
> If any of this bothers you, kindly stop here.
> 
> I tried to make this at least somewhat historically accurate with the wedding. 
> 
> Enjoy!

******

Haeun was just shy of her 14th birthday when her father told her she was betrothed to the King. She had frozen solid at the thought, saying only “yes, father” barely loud enough to be heard as inside she _quaked_.

The King was nearly as old as her grandfather. And he was to be her husband.

Her brother fought it, saying there were other girls and women in the family — _older_ girls and women— who could take her place and be just as loyal as she would be. Haeun was not even of age yet, why wait a year when they could put a Cho woman beside the King tomorrow.

Cho Hak-ju blackened his son’s eye and told him never to question him again.

“I tried, sister,” Beom-il said as she pressed a cool cloth to his eye that night. “And I’ll try again and again until the day you wed, but I don’t think it will make any difference. I just want you to be prepared for that.”

She didn’t say anything as tears dripped down her cheeks.

She needn’t have worried, as it turned out, because within three months the old King was dead in his sleep. The physician, both court and independent as brought in by the ministers to investigate amid rumors of treason and murder on the part of the Crown Prince, found absolutely nothing (not even anything they could call poisoning and blame on the Crown Prince). Just an old man dead in his bed.

Cho Hak-ju raged as the Crown Prince became the King.

The kingdom was immediately plunged into chaos as her father and his supporters protested the bastard prince’s rule. The new King fought them tooth and nail, first trying to reason with them ( _it’s useless_ , she thought as her brother updated her on the happenings in court), then with economic and political pressure, but his efforts were futile.

If it wasn’t resolved soon, her brother said, it was probably going to escalate to force. But the new King did not want that. All he wanted was peace for his kingdom and prosperity for his people.

So he agreed to make a deal. He would marry a woman from the Cho family in exchange for them releasing their grip on the food supply and lifting barricades on their cities, allowing freedom of motion and food distribution once again.

Not two hours after her brother had informed her of the new King’s plan, her father came to tell her once more that she would be marrying the King.

*******

About a week later, Haeun awoke to the sound of hushed but angry voices outside. She peaked through her window and laid eyes on her brother and...

And the _King?_

“She is a _child_ , Beom-il, not even of age!” the King snarled.

“She will be of age by the time you marry her,” her brother replied dully.

“You know when you said your father might be open to a deal if I agreed to marry a woman from your family, I imagined...oh, I don’t know... _someone closer to my age?_ You’ve got multiple cousins in their twenties, don’t you? Women, _grown_ women, not children!”

“You think I’m happy about this? You fucking see this?” Haeun saw him pulling his tunic open, motioning to the bruises that no doubt marred the skin of his abdomen given the fight he and their father had gotten into earlier. “I _tried_ , Chang. I tried!”

Haeun frowned. _Chang?!_

“I won’t marry her,” the King said. “I would be happy to marry one of your cousins, but I won’t marry her.”

“Then you plunge the country back into chaos and you know it.”

The King swore —Haeun’s eyes widened— at war with himself, before he left in a huff, _completely alone?_ Without guards or escort of any kind?!

She didn’t know what to make of that.

When she awoke the next morning, her engagement was still official and she was taken to a separate residence, Naesonjae, right away.

“It is only a short ride away,” her brother said as he hugged her. “I will visit you often.”

He almost had to pry her off to get her to let go of him.

Life at Naesonjae was spectacularly boring. Haeun already knew everything they had to teach her about etiquette and ceremony (her aunts had been instructing her in it for a long time) and aside from that she was kept quite secluded. The only thing she had to look forward to were visits from her brother as she waited the appropriate length of time between ceremonies leading up to her wedding.

“The King is a good man,” her brother told her on the eve of the final ceremony. “He will never harm you.”

Haeun did not know how he could possibly know that. Then again, she had never gotten around to asking him how it was that he came to call the King by his given name alone in a courtyard in the middle of the night.

But he didn’t look mean, she had noticed during one of the six ceremonies. He was young, much younger than his father, to whom she had been previously betrothed. Young and almost...handsome. And his eyes had been kind as he had carefully handed her the ceremonial cup of wine.

But who was to say if a man was kind or not, if you didn’t know him.

 _All men are the same,_ she had heard her aunt say once. _They want what they want and you have no choice but to give it to them._

Earlier that day, her aunts had visited and taught her everything she would need to know about being married. Including what her husband would do on their wedding night. They said it would hurt, that there would be blood. That men enjoyed it, but few women did. That she would be expected to let him do it whenever he wanted until she got pregnant.

And now Beom-il was telling her he would not harm her? Was that not harm?!

She tried not to think about it, but despite her efforts, she got no sleep that night.

They made her look like a queen in the morning. She had never seen such fine garments, never seen herself look so beautiful. They carried her to the palace in an elaborate palanquin.

Her wedding day. She tried to be happy, but all she could feel was dread.

The King looked every bit the royal he was, standing there as he received her. She bowed to him, as was expected of her, and he to her. She trembled as the ceremony went on, searching the crowd for her brother. She couldn’t find him.

It wasn’t as if he could save her now.

At the wedding feast, the King sat beside her as they shared food and drink.

 _Drink wine,_ her aunts had told her. _To dull the senses._

So she did. Several glasses of it.

“You should be careful.”

Haeun jumped at the sound of the King’s voice, surprised to hear him speak.

When he spoke again, his voice was again kind and gentle (she thought she had imagined it).

“That wine is quite strong, if you hadn’t noticed,” he went on. “And you’ve not eaten much. Carry on like that and you will find yourself quite sick.” There was a touch of a smile on his lips as he elaborated. “I only wish to spare you the unpleasant experience, having made that particular mistake more than once myself and regretted it dearly.”

He was nothing like she had expected.

She put the glass down and drank tea the rest of the night.

Night came, much as Haeun wished to high heaven it wouldn’t, and she and her new husband were shuffled off to the her new quarters. As she watched the eunuchs shut the door she trembled.

Behind her, the King sighed heavily. When she turned around, he seemed almost sad. But she couldn’t look him in the face, so maybe she was mistaken.

He held out a hand to her and after a great deal of hesitation, she took it. His grip was soft, as if he were holding a delicate piece of porcelain. 

_He won’t harm you._

_Is this not harm?_

She did not look at the bed.

_Get it over with._

Her hands shook, eyes filling with tears as she reached for the ties on the night robe the court ladies had put her in in preparation for her wedding night.

_Just get it over with, just—_

“Haeun.”

Hands over her own stopped her in her tracks, carefully drawing her robes closed. The King was careful, and his fingers did not brush any skin save that of her hands.

“Sit down for a moment.”

She did so, clutching her robes around her like a lifeline.

The King was sitting a little ways away from her, regarding her kindly. “Are you all right?”

Haeun nodded quickly. “Yes, your Majesty.”

“I recognize in public some decorum must be observed, but in private I would have you call me Chang.”

_Chang?_

The King —Chang— sighed. “Would you look at me, Haeun?”

Hesitantly, she did.

His eyes were warm as he spoke again. “I would expect you have been told of things you ‘must do’ this night, am I correct?”

Her grip tightened in her robes and she swallowed down her fear. “Yes.”

“And do you want to do these things?”

Haeun nearly frowned. What kind of a question was that? “It is part of a marriage.”

“Haeun, my dear, I was not asking what is part of a marriage, I was asking if you want to do these things with me.”

His face was so kind, his posture so nonthreatening...

Almost imperceptibly, she shook her head.

The King nodded, a gentle smile on his face. “I did not think so.”

Haeun curled in more on herself. “But the marriage must be consummated to…to ensure…” she trailed off, not meeting his eyes.

“Indeed. And they will check.”

Haeun looked up at him, confused and all the more frightened. 

The King hummed reassuringly. “I’m not sure if they told you that, but yes. The court ladies will look in the morning to ensure you are no longer a virgin, in much the same way they ensured you were before you married me.”

Haeun trembled.

“That said, my dear, it need only appear that you no longer are.”

She jumped, just a little, at the touch of the King’s hand on hers. Slowly, she looked back up at him.

“On my life, Haeun, I will never force you to do something you do not wish to do, would not do of your own free will. Anything. As such...” He pulled something from his sleeve.

She frowned. “...An egg?”

He placed it in her hand. It was made of stone, and smooth. “May I speak candidly to you, for a moment?”

Haeun ran her fingers over the smooth surface. “You mean for me to use this to make it look like I...like you...”

The King nodded, seemingly a bit surprised that she understood. “Yes...exactly.”

Haeun clutched it tightly in her hand, looking up at her husband. “Why?”

The King raised an eyebrow. “Hmm?”

“Why would you not take me yourself? It is your right.” _They told me you would and that I would have to…_

The King sighed. “Because…positions reversed, I at…how old are you, fifteen?”

Haeun nodded.

The King looked almost a bit sick for a moment, but it passed quickly over his face. “I at fifteen married to someone nearly twice my age…I would be afraid. And I don’t want you to be afraid of me. I have no wish to harm you. So I won’t. It is, remarkably, a very simple and easy choice for me to decide not to hurt you. If and when you wish to do these things with me, you can tell me that, but until then I will not ask it of you.” He nodded to the sliding doors further into the chambers. “Make sure there is blood. That is what they will look for. Then if you want, you can come back out and we can talk some more. I would like to get to know you. If not, you are more than welcome to go on to bed. I will probably do some reading then, if the light won’t bother you.”

Shakily, she nodded, stone egg clutched in her fist, and she scurried away.

She didn’t understand this man. He was nothing like everyone told her he would be.

*******

Haeun did as he had said, perhaps a little too well because it _hurt_ and there was indeed blood, but then it was done and she felt such a rush of _relief_ that she nearly fell over. She did go to bed after that, exhausted from the day and so terribly confused by her new husband it made her head ache. She slept poorly, though not as poorly as she had expected.

In the morning, the court ladies did what he said they would, and she squirmed uncomfortably under their hands, wondering if his plan would be enough, fearing what would happen if it wasn’t...

Then they pulled her skirts back down and congratulated her on her marriage, bowing to her. Bowing to the Queen. She bid everyone leave her alone, frowning at the floor.

What was a girl to make of all this? Haeun had no idea.

Men and women were to be separated, so she arranged to see the King, wondering why the eunuch smiled so beneath his sleeves.

The room they brought her to was…a mess. And there, sat amongst a pile of scrolls, was her husband. He looked up when he heard the doors open, a soft smile gracing his lips when he saw her.

“Hello, my dear.”

She turned to the eunuchs behind her. “Shut the door.”

They did so with raised eyebrows and barely suppressed chuckles.

When she turned back around, the King himself was chuckling softly. “Of course you understand now there will be talk.”

Haeun frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well, once a eunuch gets wind of a rumor, they _never_ let it go. Though I suspect the one that is now halfway to Dongnae will only work in our favor.”

Haeun had...no idea what he was talking about, but she said nothing on the matter. “It worked.”

The King’s face did not change, nor did he make any mention of what she was referring to. “I’m glad, though I suspected it did. There would have been quite the uproar had it not.” At her undoubtedly bewildered expression, he merely smiled. “Welcome to the palace, where everything is blown completely out of proportion.”

_The King is a good man. He will not harm you._

She was starting to _consider_ believing her brother.

*******

The King confused her to no end. After a bit of small talk, he told her that if she wished to speak more freely with him, he would be happy to visit her that night. Though she was a bit nervous that he would...change his mind, she agreed, remembering she had no choice in the matter.

Except where, apparently, she did.

He did not go back on his word. He also didn’t tell anyone he was planning on visiting her. They had taught her that the King must plan to visit his wife in her wing of the palace, as such she was expecting an announcement.

Certainly not a knock on her window long after the sun had set.

She stared, wide-eyed as the _King_ climbed through her window before settling happily on the floor and smiling up at her.

“What?” he asked innocently. “I don’t always enjoy the entire palace knowing where I am every minute of every day.”

And he offered to teach her how to evade the guards and servants as well.

“It does mean you have to be cognizant of your own safety, but the peace and quiet is worth the risk in my opinion.”

“Your Majesty—“

“Please,” he said gently. “Call me Chang.”

She hesitated for a moment, staring down at him. He was so strange, this was nothing like how they told her it would be, how she had imagined (dreaded)...

Carefully then, she settled beside him on the floor. “…Chang.”

He smiled.

She...rather liked that smile.

They spent the rest of the evening simply talking. He was genuinely interested in getting to know her. Wanted to know what she liked to do, if she liked to read.

She looked down at the floor. “My father always said books have no place in a woman’s hands…”

The King —Chang— scoffed. “He has no control over you anymore. You are my wife now, and if you want to read, then any text in the palace is yours to read as you please.”

She stared at him uncomprehendingly.

He returned her gaze. “Can you read?”

She shook her head.

“Then I will teach you, if you want to learn.”

*******

Months passed and he kept his word. He did not ask her for anything she would not give of her own free will, nor did he prevent her from doing whatever she wanted. Not reading, nor going outside or traveling to visit family as often as she pleased, not even…

“I want to study.”

Chang looked up at her from the paperwork he had been doing, seemingly grateful for a distraction. “And what would you like to study?”

She hadn’t been expecting to get that far. “I’m…not sure.”

He smiled at her (she did so like that smile…) “Then you must study a little of everything until you find something you like.”

“Women are not allowed to study.”

“If anyone gives you trouble, have them come talk to me and they will bother you no more.”

*******

She liked natural studies.

The court ladies fussed over her until she sent them away, saying it wasn’t proper for the Queen to be on her hands and knees in the middle of the garden examining the plants.

“Whatever would the King say, my Lady?”

She turned to them. “I do believe he would sit right next to me.”

Chang never seemed to tire of listening to her talk about her studies. From the breeding of stronger and faster horses to the cultivation of sturdier crops, he loved hearing all of it. By contrast, she still struggled with his own interest in philosophy, but he was patient with her and slowly she was catching up on the sometimes complicated concepts.

“You’re doing quite well for someone who had no education until the age of fifteen,” he told her one day as he helped her through a text (the place was absolutely aflame with the scandal of how much time Haeun spent with her husband, but she cared less and less with each passing day because her husband did not bat an eye either).

More than a year into their marriage and not once had he asked her for sex (she knew the proper words now rather than just the frightening euphemisms people had spoken in before. After she had mustered up the courage one day to ask him where he got his education on such things, he had stolen the book from the court physician for her to read). He was every bit a man of his word, and every bit the man her brother had said he was.

And he was…quite handsome, wasn’t he? She found herself noticing that more and more often, a blush threatening on her cheeks whenever he would smile at her.

“I’m glad to see you happy,” Beom-il said one day.

She nodded, if a bit distantly. Was that what this was? Happiness? “Yes…” she said, pondering.

But there was still one mystery she hadn’t solved. Her husband had said he would answer any question she asked of him fully and honestly, and for the most part that was true. Until the day she caught him in a lie.

“How did my brother come to call you by your given name?”

He looked over at her. “Commander Cho Beom-il?”

She nodded.

He let out a soft breath. “We were childhood friends once. But he has not referred to me by that name since we could still be called children.”

He was called away before she could ask him about the night outside her family home. She watched him go, confusion furrowing her brow.

_Why would he lie?_

One day, she found out. She had snuck out of her quarters in the middle of the night, just like Chang had taught her, gone to spend some time with her husband. She crept up to his window, about to knock on it, when she heard a noise. A strange noise. Something between a gasp and a whine. Frowning, she cracked open the window just enough to see inside.

There she recognized her husband, though not as she had ever seen him before. While he was normally so put together, now his appearance was completely —beautifully— disheveled.

His hair was completely unbound, luxuriously falling over his shoulders. His head was thrown back, those odd little sounds escaping his mouth as he clutched at the body of…

Another man.

Her heart jumped into her throat as her eyes widened in shock.

The other man had him pressed up against the wall, one of Chang’s legs wrapped around his waist, had his mouth pressed to the line of his throat as he thrust his hips against the King’s.

Haeun’s eyes ran up and down the King’s naked body —what she could see of it anyway— and an odd feeling settled low in her belly, making her want something she couldn’t quite name.

Still a thousand other thoughts ran through her head, namely _this was forbidden_ and _who was that other man?_ The King could keep concubines, but not men, never men—

The man said something she couldn’t quite hear, eliciting a laugh from her husband that quickly morphed into a moan that went straight through Haeun’s core in a way that made her shiver. She ignored it, because while she hadn’t understood what was said, she would recognize that voice anywhere.

Beom-il.

She shut the window and fled, getting no sleep that night.

The next night, she did sleep and she dreamt of the King holding her like that.

******

“Haeun?” she jumped from where she had been reading in the garden. She blinked as her eyes adjusted to the light, though it was blocked by a figure. That of her husband, as it were.“Are you all right?” he asked. “We have not spoken in…a long while.”

Indeed, not since she had seen something she could not quite understand. She had not been able to think of what to say to him and could not think of anything now.

“Have I said something? Done something to upset you? If so, I hope you know you can tell me what it was, so that I may apologize and rectify my error.”

_Done something…_

“Tonight,” she said suddenly, slapping her book shut and lowering her voice. “Come see me tonight and I’ll tell you.”

He nodded. “All right.”

*******

The knock on her window came right when she was expecting it would. She opened it and pulled him in.

He smiled at her ( _she loved that smile_ ). “It’s good to see you, my dear. I’ve missed you.

She had missed him too.

Even now though, with him in front of her, she could not think of what to say, caught between _I saw you and I have no idea what to think_ and _I can’t stop thinking about how you looked, and I can’t stop wanting what I don’t understand_.

She thought to say the second, tell him what she burned for, what she had been dreaming about for weeks, but in a flash of anxiety, she said the first. “I saw you.”

The King frowned. “I’m sorry?”

“Two weeks ago. Late at night. With a man in your room.”

And she watched as all the color drained from her husband’s face.

“…I see,” he said, voice rough, eyes alight with…fear?

Beyond that she had no idea what to say. What did she want to say? Why did she call him here.

 _Because I don’t understand. I don’t understand what I saw and I don’t understand what I_ feel…

“Say something,” she said, voice shaking.

“I don’t know what you want me to say.”

She was crying. She didn’t understand why she was crying.

Her husband, too, looked very sad and very exhausted. “So I suppose that’s it then.”

“W-what?”

He raised an eyebrow, face impassive. “You tell your father what you saw and I’m dead by the end of the week. Is that not what you mean to do? I suppose I appreciate the courtesy of you telling me first, though perhaps it would have been better to be blindsided and not know if was my dear wife who turned me in...”

She trembled first in confusion and then in anger. “No…no! No, I don’t want you dead!”

That made Chang frown. “But your father—“

“I hate him! I hate him and my whole family, save my brother! I don’t care what they want anymore!” Her husband’s face softened as she said those words. “And I can’t very well turn you in because it was my brother who was with you!”

“You saw quite a bit, didn’t you.”  
  
She fought to keep a blush from her cheeks as her hands shook. “How long?”

He took a deep breath and sighed. “Goodness…I don’t know. A long time. Since we were younger than you.”

She didn’t know what to think, how to feel. Part of her felt betrayed and part of her didn’t understand a _thing_. “And you married his sister?”

“I wasn’t given much of a choice,” he said carefully. “It was marry you or toss our kingdom into ruin. I confess I was not happy about marrying a girl so young, but…but now I’m happy it was you I married. You are perhaps my dearest friend, Haeun, and my closest confidant.”

 _And you’re my only friend, save my brother._

There was another part of her, a part that scared her because she didn’t understand it, didn’t know where it came from or what to do with it. All she knew was that she _wanted_ , wanted so badly she could hardly stand it.

“Chang.”

“Hmm?”

She took two steps towards him, grabbed him around the back of the neck (he was so tall, she had to stand on her tip toes), pulled him down and kissed him. Wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him some more.

Him. She wanted _him._ She wanted to pull his hair down, run her fingers through it, strip his robes from his shoulders and—

And such a powerful flash of anxiety went through her, halting her thoughts in their tracks, and she broke away, letting go of him completely and stepping back. He let her, hadn’t even touched her, had only been gently kissing her back, despite her feverish need.

She didn’t look at him, fear and desire warring within her. “I don’t understand…what I feel…”

“Neither did I when I was your age.”

She shivered. “I…I want you.”

“You do…and you don’t.” He could read her like a book, couldn’t he. “You don’t have to do this now. I’m not going anywhere, Haeun.”

“But I—“

“To be honest with you, I don’t feel comfortable myself.”

Her mouth snapped shut as she stared at him.

He gave her a kind smile, meeting her gaze. “You are still so young. I fear I would unwittingly hurt you even if I put forward my best efforts to make sure I didn’t. There is...also burgeoning evidence from rural communities that women who bear children later in life suffer fewer complications with childbirth. Above all I don’t wish to see you suffer so.”

She looked away.

“Haeun.” She looked back up at him. “Is that what you’re wanting? Children?”

Even then, she thought first of her duties as Queen. And she did want children, if only to prove to her father that she could raise strong sons without beating them bloody.Quickly though, she thought of her newfound freedom and everything she still had yet to try. None of which she could do pregnant...

She shook her head.

Her husband nodded again. “I’m not going anywhere,” he repeated. “We are both young still, you especially so. Give it a few more years. Then we will speak again on this matter, yes?”

“…All right.” She fidgeted just a little. “…Will you kiss me again? Just one more time?”

Chang smiled indulgently. “Yes, that I can do.”

He bent down and pecked her gently on the lips, hardly the kiss she wanted (she wanted him to kiss her like she had seen her brother kiss him) though it made her feel warm all the same. Then he kissed her forehead and pulled her into his arms. She relaxed a bit against his chest, his heart beating under her ear, content.

Yet...something still bothered her.

“You don’t love me, do you?”

Her husband sighed, patting her back. “I do love you, Haeun,” he began. “…though not in the way you want me to.”

She stiffened in his arms, fingers tightening in his robes. “Why not?”

“I don’t know if I can love a woman like that.”

She thought again to what she had seen. (It wouldn’t be until much later when she would understand the gravity of what he had just confessed to her, and what that meant for how much he _trusted_ her, and he did not trust anyone. When she finally realized that, she would never again feel slighted)

“Oh, my dear…” Chang pulled back from her ever so slightly, cupping her cheek. It was then that she realized she was crying again. “I’ve hurt you terribly, I fear.”

“I don’t know…” she whispered. “I don’t understand…”

He hugged her again, let her bury his face in his robes and just stand there, supporting her as a battle waged within her.

 _I’m glad to see you happy_ , her brother had said a while ago.

_She still didn’t understand…All the same…_

“Chang?”

“Hmm?”

She stayed where she was in the cradle of his arms. “How do you know if you’re happy?”

His hand brushed comfortingly over her hair as he shrugged. “I’m not sure…I suppose if you’re…content with the way things are. That you don’t want them to change, wouldn’t want to leave them.”

She pondered that for a long while. “I…I don’t think I’m sad,” she finally said, even as a few tears rolled down her cheeks.

“No?”

“No…no I think I’m happy. I think I’m terribly happy.”

When she looked up, her husband was smiling at her. “In that case I’m glad.”

He held her for a while longer, and when he let go of her, immediately she missed him. “I should go. I would like to get some sleep tonight and I still have quite the mountain of anxiety to get through before I sleep.”

She frowned at him. “Why?”

He huffed out a laugh. “You _scared_ me, Haeun. I thought I would be executed by the end of the week when you said you’d seen me. That was quite the shock.”

“Oh…” She hadn’t thought of it like that. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right.” And he nodded to her, preparing to go, before she called him back.

“Chang?”

He looked over his shoulder.

“I…” She clasped her hands in front of her. “I don’t mind. That you see my brother I mean. If he makes you happy…”

“He does.”

She nodded. “I…I want you to be happy.”

Chang smiled at her, the widest smile she had ever seen on him. She smiled back. “You know, Haeun?”

“Hmm?”

“I think that’s the first time I’ve ever seen you smile.”

She pondered that late into the night, long after Chang had left.

*******

She had never seen her father so angry. Not at her, anyway.

“What did you say?” His voice was so quiet, but it held so much menace.

“I said no. He’s the King now and you just have to accept that. I refuse to spy on my husband for you. I refuse to bear him a son only to have you kill him and raise my son as your puppet!”

“I thought that’s what you said. You would do well to remember, girl, that I put you where you are. Everything you have now I have given you and I can just as easily take it away.”

She could almost taste the cruelty in the air.

 _Give in_ , her mind whispered fearfully. _Just give in and save yourself and figure it out later…_

 _But…_ she also thought _. What he said…it’s not true. Everything I have now isn’t because of him. It’s because of Chang._

“I won’t do it,” she said, voice starting out as a whisper before rising in volume to nearly a shout. “I won’t betray my husband for anyone! Least of all for you.”

Cho Hak-ju raised a hand and Haeun squeaked, curling in on herself, bracing for the hit (she could count on one hand the number of times her father had hit her. Beom-il had taken the rest of them for her, of which there had been many). But it never made contact. In fact, after a moment of just sitting there waiting, she found herself looking up to see what had happened, what had made him change his mind.

She found her father in much the same position he had been in, with his hand raised. Only someone had wrapped their hand around his wrist, stopping him from striking her.

Chang stepped out from behind her father, fingers biting bruises into his wrist. She hadn’t heard him come in.

 _“How dare you!”_ he snarled at the councilor. Haeun shivered at her husband’s powerful voice.

“Stay out of this,” her father breathed, pure _hatred_ in his eyes. “You have no right.”

Chang stepped between her and her father. “No right?” he asked with a laugh. “I am the King and she is my wife. It is _you_ who has no right.”

Her father’s eyes glittered with malice. “And what do you, little King, plan to do about it? You have no real power and you know it.”

Chang met his gaze. “Is that right? _Guard!_ ” To Haeun’s surprise, the guards entered at his command. “Throw this man in a cell. He has threatened to harm the Queen and is therefore guilty of treason.”

Again Haeun feared her father’s power, feared that what he said about her husband being a puppet King like his father was true, that her father’s hold over the kingdom was still great enough that the guards would rather harm the King instead.

But her fears were unfounded, and she watched in astonishment as they dragged her father away.

The second he was out of sight, Chang turned and swept her into his arms.

“Are you all right?”

Haeun couldn’t answer verbally, suddenly so terribly overwhelmed. She wrapped her arms around her husband’s neck and bawled into his shoulder (she would have time to feel embarrassed about it later), whispering her thanks into his skin.

He shushed her gently. “It’s all right,” he murmured, holding her tight. “You’re safe with me, it’s all right. He can’t hurt you anymore…”

She loved him _so much._

Later that night, sleeping in Chang’s bed (just sleeping) because she hadn’t felt safe in her own, she heard her husband and brother speaking in hushed voices.

“It won’t stick. With you as the only witness it will never stick.”

“I’m the King, that has to count for something.”

“In this kingdom?”

“She was there as well. The King and the Queen, how will they not believe us?”

“Do you really need to ask that question?”

Her husband fell silent as bitter frustration permeated the air.

Beom-il spoke again after a while. “…We have to make it stick. He will have her killed if he gets out…”

“Then he won’t get out. I am not a puppet King and he is guilty of treason. That will not be allowed to stand.” He sighed heavily. “But we cannot take the risk…” A pause. “How much are you willing to do to keep your sister safe?”

“Anything,” her brother answered immediately. “And you your wife?”

“Anything.”

*******

A day later and her father was dead in an apparent suicide. She cried when Chang sat down in front of her and told her. He held her hands as she sobbed.

“I’m sorry, my dear…” he murmured. “I know your relationship was fraught, but he was your father all the same…”

“Is it finally over?” she asked through her tears, holding tight to Chang’s hands.

“Haeun?”

She looked up at him. “Am I finally free of him?” He stared at her as she sniffed, wiping away her tears on her sleeve. “Thank you…”

He immediately pulled her into his arms. “You heard us?” he whispered in her ear. She nodded. He shivered. “You can never—“

“I simply don’t know what you’re talking about, husband,” she replied, voice carefully neutral. “My father died by suicide. It was a terrible tragedy.” She lowered her voice so only he could hear it. “But the kingdom was better for it.”

His arms tightened around her. She relaxed into them.

*******

The funeral was quite the affair.

Her entire family came of course. They all consoled Beom-il, the new head of the family (who was struggling to keep the smile off his face), to excess. Her aunts especially exhausted her with their wailing, occasionally throwing her dirty looks, undoubtedly wondering why she wasn’t crying.

She did try, just to keep up appearances, but in reality she couldn’t wait for this show to be over. Bury him already and let her get back to her suddenly much improved life.

“Haeun, you really shouldn’t smile at your father’s funeral,” her husband murmured.

She cleared her throat and wiped it from her face. “I’m doing better than my brother at least.”

He hummed.

She fought again to hold back a smile as she thought of the bottle of soju she had swiped from the kitchen that morning. She was planning to drink the entire thing later that night (and her husband was more than welcome to say ‘I told you so’ if she regretted it after the fact) because with her father gone, she really could do whatever she wanted.

_Free…she was finally free…_

Had the sun always been that bright? The flowers always so radiant? She hadn’t noticed.

*******

She threw open the doors of his study, a group of servant scurrying behind her in quite the dither. “Chang!”

“Yes, dear?”

“I’m borrowing your horse.”

“Oh?”

“I overheard someone say women can’t race and I have a problem with that.”

He hummed, not looking up from his work. “Well that was their mistake, wasn’t it? Have fun.”

“Your Majesty!”

The King finally looked up at the exasperated voice of the head eunuch.

“She cannot _possibly_ race, she could be _injured!_ ”

“Indeed. Do be careful, darling.”

The head eunuch spluttered. “Your Majesty, you must stop her!”

The King smiled amusedly. “Stop her? I’m afraid you’ve got this all wrong.”

The eunuch straightened his back. “Your Majesty, if I may, I must remind you that _you_ are the husband and the King! _You_ are the dominant one.”

Chang snorted. “Yes, and I have my wife’s permission to say so. Truly, have you met her? Far be it from me to try and deny her anything.”

Haeun hid her smile.

The servants left in a huff to go ready the horse, but Haeun stayed behind, smiling at her husband of three years. “Thank you, love. They need a reminder every now and again that I make my own decisions now.”

“Of course. Anything to make you smile, my dear.”

She grinned widely then. “I love you.”

“And I you.”

She left him to his work. It didn’t matter that they didn’t mean it in the same way. She was content.

Against all odds, she was _happy_.

**_El Fin_ **

**Author's Note:**

> Goddamnit Bucky will you ever stop pulling shit outta Marco Polo and putting into Kingdom fics? Haha nope. 
> 
> My stories never go the way I expect them to, do they? This was gonna be it, but then a conversation with Raiya gave me an idea, so we'll see where I go with it. Thanks so much for reading! Let me know what you think :3


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